A question out into the void . . . why do people choose to be mean and say hateful things when they have the chance not to?
Case in point: In the mini classes, most of the people who show are kids or first time adults - never been to a show, nervous, scared . . you get the idea. They always ask for a walk through (that's when you go through each step of the course so there will be no mistakes about what the judge expects) While I don't need a walk through, still, (because I was and guess ever will be a teacher), I always go with the kids and answer questions. So here I was, going over the pattern for obstacle when the show 'manager' came up to me and demanded (I'd like to say he asked, but that would be a lie), demanded to know why people had to have a walk through. He was very vocal about hating the whole thing . . .hating the time it took, and 'Why are people so stupid they can't read a legend???'
Now, while I understand and even agree with him that it is way simple and is time consuming, still, being that this is an open kids show, what is the big deal? And even if it was, why did he have to come at it with that hateful angle?
I don't get it. Do people really like being so unhappy? Do they detest seeing others happy and feel it is their duty to squelch it? Can they help it, or is it so ingrained that they are past redemption? How in the world do they enjoy life? And how can others enjoy being around them? How horribly lonely is the path they walk, right?
Couldn't he have simply accompanied us on the walk through and seen the fear these kids had? Wouldn't that have made the whole thing more than worth the 2 minutes it took? At the very least, why didn't he go into the mens room and bang his head against the stall wall quietly, leaving the scared kids to their task?
I don't get it. But then, I already said that.
2 comments:
Very good question. I wonder the same thing very often. But sometimes I'm guilty of this and I really hate myself at those times. But it also helps me remember that there may be something else going on in some ones life when they act that way. It helps me to offer up a quick prayer for them.
some people just are unhappy and want everyone else to be to. Sometimes some are just having a bad day. one of my best friends once got mad at me for being happy all the time because he didn't feel he could be happy at that time and punished me for my happiness(i think i did that sometimes too). Some times some just don't know how to deal with the troubles going on in their life,i think being nice to others, exspecial in times of personal crisis, is a learned behavior and if there is noone to teach it... see the pattern forming.
as educators and special educators we are taught not to become defensive at a child's anger or rudeness (this is hadr for me) but to instead ask them what happend, what they're going through to make them act this way. Ask if their negative attitude is really helping them feel better (i wouldn't ask this to an adult, unless maybe i'm really good friends) and then the hardes thing for me to do instead of becoming upset and challenging their behavior, asking what i can do to help them feel better or help make their day easier. i know i can't change other's behavior but i forget that i can change mine or i remember and just don't wanna! I love you!!!
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